What does modesty mean to me?

mod·est

 

adjective \ˈmä-dəst\

Definition of MODEST

1

a : placing a moderate estimate on one's abilities or worth

b : neither bold nor self-assertive : tending toward diffidence

2

: arising from or characteristic of a modest nature

3

: observing the proprieties of dress and behavior : decent

4

a : limited in size, amount, or scope <a family of modestmeans>

b : unpretentious <a modest home>

via M-W.com

Around the Catholic blogosphere, there has been a lot of discussion regarding modesty. It seems as though each individual has their own rules regarding what is viewed as "modest".  In my opinion, modesty is defined by the amount of "skin" that is showing and whether your attire causes you to receive inappropriate attention. 

Tops - Generally, tops should have sleeves. If they do not have sleeves, they should have thick enough straps that your bra straps are not showing. When you lean forward, you should not be revealing cleavage. Also, when bending, your shirt should not pull away from your pants or skirt to reveal skin. I do not particularly subscribe to the two finger rule. "A dress cannot be called decent which is cut deeper than two fingers breadth under the pit of the throat..."

via

Bottoms - I am not an exclusively "skirt wearing" woman. However, I love my long skirts because they are comfortable, lady-like, and modest. It is the easiest way to get dressed, look nice, and feel good. I wear sweats, jeans, and dress pants however, I make sure that they are not too tight. By too tight, I mean they do not show underwear lines. Bottoms of any variety should not show any part of your buttocks. I also do not wear pants that have any kind of words across the backside. I make sure my pants have a high enough rise that nothing is exposed when sitting or bending.

Dresses - I tend to wear dresses on special occasions - Christmas, a fancy dinner, a special concert or other event, or even Sunday Mass.  I enjoy getting dressed up and wearing accompanying jewelry such as pearl earrings or a necklace.   The dresses I choose to wear generally do not have a low neckline.   I don't feel comfortable wearing that type of clothing.   Also, I don't wear short dresses, such as a mini-skirt.  My rules regarding underwear lines and appropriate fit also apply to dresses.  

I'd love it if you shared your thoughts on modesty in the comments section below! 

7 Quick Takes

1. I've started so many posts this week and haven't been able to finish any of them since Charlie appears to have given up sleeping again. Could this be another growth spurt?
   
2. We are going to a play date today with some other baby wearing moms. If any of you are locals, there is a group called Long Island Baby Wearing on Facebook. The women there are wonderful and friendly! We try to have play dates/ meetings each month at a different person's house.
   
3. We are preparing for the possibility of Hurricane Sandy heading our way. When Irene hit this area, my parents were without power and phone for seven days. So, if I disappear next week, that would be why. Please say some prayers for everyone's safety.
   
   O Heavenly Father, all the elements of nature obey Your commands, including hurricanes. Calm the storms that threaten us and turn our fear of Your power into praise of Your goodness. Grant this through Our Lord Jesus Christ, Your Son, who lives and reigns with the Holy Spirit, one God forever and ever. Amen.
    via
   
4. I hope Charlie will get to wear his cute dinosaur costume for Halloween!
   
5. The exterior of my parents house is being painted therefore, I am becoming well versed in Spanish language opera. The gentlemen enjoy singing opera at the top of their lungs.
   
6. I am trying desperately to finish these before Charlie wakes up.
   
7. I made these to share with the play group today. I made them with the dark chocolate version of the fudge stripes cookies and green icing. Since I did it with the dark chocolate version, you didn't have to flip the cookie over and it added a little bit of decoration. They came out really cute and tasty!

Source: womendres.blogspot.com via Elvin on Pinterest

Why I love nights and weekends

I'm a stay at home mom and love spending time with my little guy during the day. However, I have begun to LOVE nights and weekends because the hubby is home. We've always had an equal partnership. This means we both handle our finances, our chores, and now our child. We don't have clearly defined jobs in our marriage but, I think it works because we both have a sense of what needs to be done.

The LORD God said: "It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a suitable partner for him."

-Genesis 2:18

I often think back to our PreCana classes, in particular when we were discussing the FOCCUS questionnaire. I found this questionnaire interesting because we scored exceptionally high. I was super proud of our perfect score in problem solving! I kind of feel like our team approach to all things marriage and family works because of our problem solving abilities.

On weekdays (and soon some weekends) when the hubby is at work, I feel like I am missing one of my arms or part of my brain. Some might say that's because I'm with an infant all day who babbles nonsense but, I honestly think it is because my partner, my equal, is not there with me. Two brains are absolutely better than one and. Four arms are absolutely better than two, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ARE WORKING TOGETHER!

God made them male and female.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.

In just two short years of marriage and four short months of being a parent, we are an inseparable team. The priest who presided over our wedding Mass spoke to us about how we should have a competition regarding who could love the other more not a competition as to who is more "right" or more "productive". He was absolutely right. Each day, the hubby and I do very different things. However, our goal is to do what is best for our family each and every day.

As I am writing this, I am reminded that while we are inseparable team that works together like a well oiled machine we do have disagreements. But, we do not allow these disagreements to break apart the team because we know that we both want what is best for our family. Of course, there are days when we go to bed angry because when you are tired isn't the best time to hash out something that requires careful thought and consideration for your partner. Just because you may go to bed angry doesn't mean that your spouse doesn't love you, in our house it mean that you love each other enough not to hurt the other by saying things that you don't mean because you are exhausted.

Having an infant, whose sleep schedule is sporadic at best, has definitely changed our relationship however, we are learning how to make our marriage stronger as a result.

Linking to: MercyINK and Cornerstone Confessions

A Special Saturday for Charlie: Roman Catholic Baptism

Yesterday, our beautiful little boy was baptized during a private Mass. It was absolutely perfect. Charlie was so attentive and couldn't take his eyes off of Fr. Mike. Our little one knew that it was a special day for him. Mike told us that one of the greatest blessings a child could receive was from his/her parents. He encouraged us to trace a cross on Charlie's head each night before bed. Mike asked us to pray with Charlie and for Charlie as a family. (So, we'll still be searching for some family prayer resources!) It is heartwarming to know that Charlie was welcomed into the Catholic church and the Christian community at large with open arms.

One of the things that made the day so special was that my brother was in attendance and was able to serve the Mass, with his friend, for Charlie. My brother is also the little one's Godfather. Charlie is so taken with him. Before Thursday, he had only ever seen him on Skype. Right now, he loves looking at his Godfather and playing with his beard.

A few parents' prayers for their children:
O God the Father of mankind, who hast given unto me these my children, and committed them to my charge to bring them up for Thee, and to prepare them for eternal life: help me with Thy heavenly grace, that I may be able to fulfil this most sacred duty and stewardship. Teach me both what to give and what to withhold; when to reprove and when to forbear; make me to be gentle, yet firm; considerate and watchful; and deliver me equally from the weakness of indulgence, and the excess of severity; and grant that, both by word and example, I may be careful to lead them in the ways of wisdom and true piety, so that at last I may, with them, be admitted to the unspeakable joys of our true home in heaven, in the company of the blessed Angels and Saints. Amen.

O Heavenly Father, I commend my children to Thy care. Be Thou their God and Father; and mercifully supply whatever is lacking in me through frailty or negligence. Strengthen them to overcome the corruptions of the world, whether from within or without; and deliver them from the secret snares of the enemy. Pour Thy grace into their hearts, and strengthen and multiply in them the gifts of Thy Holy Spirit, that they may daily grow in grace and in knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ; and so, faithfully serving Thee here, may come to rejoice in Thy presence hereafter. Amen.

Here is a list of Parents' Prayers for your Children:

• A Parents Prayer for a growing infant
• A Prayer of blessing for an infant
• A Mother’s Prayer to the Guardian Angel of her child
• A beautiful Mothers Prayer for her children
• Parent's prayer for a the grace to correct a child
• Prayer to obtain confidence of a child
• A Prayer to St Monica for the grace of being a good mother
• Other Prayers for Family

We received many beautiful cards. However, two had verses in that stood out.

Isaiah 43:1: Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

I have called you by name: you are mine.

I have always loved this song. 

Jeremiah 1:5: Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,

before you were born I dedicated you,

a prophet to the nations I appointed you.

http://www.goodmorninggirls.org/ 
http://internetcafedevotions.com/wfw/ 
http://rannthisthat.blogspot.com/

Love one another

I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another.

John 13:34

We are waiting for the arrival of Hurricane Irene. I believe we are as prepared as we can be. I only wish our landlady would take in all of her stuff that is on the outside of our property because I do not want it flying into our giant picture window. In the event that it does, we have moved most of our belongings away from the window and will continue to move things away as the day goes on. It looks like by the time Hurricane Irene gets here it will be a category 1 hurricane. The biggest issue is that they are unsure as to whether the center of the hurricane will be super close to us bringing high winds. So, we are here and we are hanging in there. 

NYC keeps saying to open your home to those that are evacuated from their home so that the shelters don't get overcrowded. We have posted on Facebook that we are not in an evacuation area so, family and friends on Long Island and Staten Island can come to stay with us. We have plenty of resources so, my hope is those relatives of mine that are "staying with their homes" would be willing to come here. At some point your life is more important than your property. 

The Nassau County Supervisor is calling for "Common sense from the Nassau County residents." Please leave when they tell you to. Gov. Christie told the NJ shore residents to "Get the h-e-double hockey sticks off the beach." Mayor Bloomberg has said, "If you don't evacuate you may die." Clearly the government employees are tense about what is happening. I would think that you should heed their warnings and do what you need to to comply with their directions. 

We are expecting the storm tonight between midnight and noon tomorrow. We are expecting flooding and high winds. Guess we won't be sleeping much tonight. 

Meal Ministry

"Tell them to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous, ready to share..."

 1 Timothy 6:18

Have any of you ever been involved in delivering meals to those in need?

As I mentioned yesterday, one of my dear friends started chemotherapy. She received her first treatment yesterday. Her mother is staying with her until Saturday but, after that it will be up to her husband to care for her. He will be working full time and therefore will not have time to do a lot of cooking, cleaning, and grocery shopping. Therefore, we are setting up some meal deliveries for the two of them.

We are using Take Them A Meal. To help us organize who is bringing what on what nights. It seems like with the help of this website it will almost run itself. Janelle @ Comfy In the Kitchen has lots of great recipes on her blog. I love that her recipes are already measured out for two portions, one for your family and one for the family in need.

Many people we e-mail responded that they don't cook therefore they can't help. We are trying to impress upon them that even a take out/ordered in meal would be helpful. They can still share whatever talents they may have with our friends.

Tonight, I made pulled pork tenderloin with honey BBQ sauce and coleslaw. This was simple, filling, and tasty. I hope that my friend and her husband enjoy it as well. My other co-worker is scheduled to visit tomorrow and will bring the food with her when she goes.

Pulled Pork Tenderloin (Slow Cooker) & Coleslaw

2 - 1lb tenderloins
1 cup of water
A dash of cumin, chili powder, salt, pepper, onion powder and garlic powder
1/2 bottle Honey BBQ sauce
1/2 head of cabbage, chopped
3 carrots, shredded
Coleslaw dressing to taste

Cover the tenderloins with spice mixture. Place in slow cooker and cover with 1 cup of water. Cook on high for six hours. Remove pork from slow cooker. Shred it using two forks. Pour 1/2 bottle of BBQ sauce over it and mix.

Coleslaw: Mix carrots and cabbage together. Add coleslaw dressing.

Package in disposable containers whenever possible!

Prayers...

Please pray for a dear friend of ours who begins her first round of chemotherapy today. 

May God heal her,

body and soul.

May her pain cease,

May her strength increase,

May her fears be released,

May blessings, love,and joy surround her.

Amen.

When I asked her what we (her friends and community) can do for her, her response was pray, cook, clean, and take me to broadway shows. So, I'm on top of the praying thing. I'm working on the cooking thing. Anyone have any recipes they can share?

As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace.

1 Peter 4:10

Share and share alike

And the crowds asked Him (John the Baptist), "What then shall we do?" And He answered them, "Whoever has two tunics is to share with him who has none, and whoever has food is to do likewise." Luke 3:10-11

When you are on vacation with thirteen people of varying ages, genders, and interests, you share quite a bit. When these verses came in an e-mail earlier this week, I thought these were perfect to describe our family vacation.

Several years ago, our family and my cousins began coming together to cape cod. We rent a two floor unit. We share meals, clothes, beach towels, sunblock, and everything else that you could possible think of. Vacation is a great way to see how communal living really works. 

As we prepare to end our vacation, we have to separate our belongings until we return again. We know we will all see each other again soon so, it's not a big deal if we keep each others belongings. We all have enough that we will not be destitute without whatever it is. 

In just a few minutes, the male cousins will come downstairs  and share whatever food and drink we have to offer. My cousins' cousin came to the Cape with homemade earrings to share with the women on vacation. Some of the things I like about vacation is that we share EVERYTHING, there are few boundaries, everyone is relaxed.

Life is simple when you live out of a backpack and the two things that matter are whether the tide is coming in or out and whether it is sunny or not.